>I’ll See Yours and Double Down!

>My friend Becky in Denver, aka the Mile High Seductive Enchantress, keeps one of my favorite blogs over at Release the Kraken Please, and she is also a frequent commenter here on my blog. She’s humorous and fun and I get a real kick out of her blog posts and twitter updates. Sometimes they’re random, sometimes they are hilarious, and sometimes they are heartfelt and warm. They always have lots of pictures, something I really enjoy (which probably isn’t surprising considering how I usually load my posts with so many pictures). I like her style of blogging, the kind that is a little window into another person’s life that doesn’t feel all pre-planned and manufactured. So yeah, Becky is on my list of favorite people.

What is really odd to me, though, is that while she used to live in Missoula, and we know a lot of the same people, we’ve never actually met face to face. It’s possible that we did back in the day and just don’t remember, but it’s still strange to me.

The Office Experiment

She and her work friends occasionally do these little outings they call “Office Experiments.” It usually involves food of one kind or another, and usually food that’s kind of gross. For example, one time they did one around the McDonald’s McRib. Another was a trip to a Dave & Buster’s restaurant. The other day she mentioned on Twitter that they were going to go try the new Double Down sandwich from KFC. Literally minutes before I read her post, I had been in my truck running an errand and had heard an ad for the sandwich and was properly horrified. So when I read her announcement, I knew that I had to be IN on the project, as kind of a satellite member of her crew.

So what is the Double Down? Get a load of this:

The new KFC Double Down sandwich is real! This one-of-a-kind sandwich features two thick and juicy boneless white meat chicken filets (Original Recipe® or Grilled), two pieces of bacon, two melted slices of Monterey Jack and pepper jack cheese and Colonel’s Sauce. This product is so meaty, there’s no room for a bun! » Watch the TV Commercial

I haven’t been to a KFC in years, that I recall, though I have a long relationship with the place. When my friends and I moved to the Seattle area back in the 80s to become rock stars, the first job my roommate and I had was working at a KFC (for those who know the Renton area, it’s the one on Rainier Avenue just north of the I405/167 interchange, next to a strip mall that housed a Budget Tapes & Records store). We worked there about 8 months or so, at $3.35/hour, before landing bigger and better jobs (starting a $6.00/hour; we thought we were rich). Of the many things I remember about working there, one time KFC introduced these mini sandwiches called “Chicken Littles.” They were actually pretty tasty; basically oversized nuggets on a bun. What I recall though is we were all brought in on a Saturday morning to be indoctrinated on them. The regional manager, Tom (we referred to him as Dick because that’s basically what he was), gave this big speech about them, and we all got to sample a couple. A couple other little mid-management sycophants were there, and I specifically recall the trio standing near the back office, talking about the ramifications of their new sandwich in the fast food market. This guy said, stone cold serious, “What we are doing is starting a war. We are starting . . . a WAR.” I about died laughing; I had to retreat into the walk-in cooler to regain composure. What a dork.

So I don’t like KFC, even without going into a rant about their factory-farmed chicken. This particular KFC in Missoula, which is also an A&W, is in a building that used to be a fantastic pizza joint called Little Big Men Pizza, with a big round fireplace in the middle. I ate many a LBM pizza; it was a favorite. We’d splurge there now and then after band practice, when finances allowed us to deviate from the usual 4-hot dogs-for-a-dollar menu at Ole’s. It’s a travesty that this once great enterprise is now a friggin’ KFC and 2nd-rate burger outlet.

Via the genius of our synchronized efforts, you can check out Becky’s Double Down results right here! Dig ’em. Here’s mine. . . .

Fortune Favors the Bold

I was still game for the Office Experiment, though, don’t get me wrong. I was in the middle of a busy day when the whole thing went down, so I went for the drive thru, since the KFC is only about 6 or 8 blocks from my house.

I took it home and put it all on a plate to eat at my desk. The dining room table has pretty much been owned by Julia’s Project Selvedge work, and I don’t like to risk touching anything with my greasy fingers.

Opening up the sandwich, it somehow didn’t live up to the publicity photos. Imagine that!

I hate pepper jack cheese, so I just doubled up on the Monterey Jack. The whole thing was pretty slippery and squishy, and the bacon was essentially invisible. I wasn’t entirely sure how to approach the thing.

At this point I was a little grossed out. I ate a couple potato wedges (at least I think there was potato somewhere under all the grease and breading) and contemplated. I cut away the excess cheese and attacked the thing with knife and fork. I figured if I tried to hold it it was going to slip out of my grip and soil my desk. I couldn’t have that!

With all the excess gook cut away, it wasn’t too bad. I don’t know that I would order one again, though. If I’m ever forced to return to the Colonel’s, I’d probably go with a couple slabs of extra crispy instead. Or maybe some fake mashed potatoes and gravy and a couple biscuits.

All in all, I’d give it about 2.5 out of 5 stars. Sorry, Colonel. Should’ve stuck with Chicken Littles.

Don’t forget to check out how things went down in Denver right here!

11 thoughts on “>I’ll See Yours and Double Down!

  1. Keith Rawson

    >You're going to have forgive my language on this one, Chris. But that's some of the sickest looking fucking excuse for food I've ever seen. Jesus, I almost had a heart attack looking at it

  2. Chris

    >Becky, I'd hire us.Keith, no worries, and now you don't have to wonder about that sandwich. I went there so you won't have to. Because that's the kind of guy I am.

  3. Richard R.

    >this item of fast food looks really disgusting, and I'm a person who's perfectly with big drippy sauce-laden burgers from Carl's. I'll take my chicken grilled at home, thanks.

  4. Nikki Valiant

    >Two people in my office were eating this abomination on Friday. It looked so disgusting in real life that I was absolutely repulsed, to the point of having to leave the room. I can't believe you managed to choke one down. But the most hilarious part for me is that you did it on a plate, all proper like with a knife and fork. Awesome.

  5. Chris

    >Nikki, I was pretty repulsed too when I opened up the box it came in, to be honest. I cut away a lot of the grossest part, and thankfully it was MUCH smaller than I thought it'd be.As for the knife and fork, I am nothing if not proper, 100% of the time.


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